Before he left for Christmas, my boss told me how people get depressed towards the end of the year and the suicide rates climb up.  It was only last Thursday that I laughed at the story.  Now I completely sympathize with it.

Come to think of it, I never really spent both Christmas days alone.  There were always family, boyfriends, friends, colleagues or classmates.  This year, living away from family (and cannot see them because it’s a normal weekday), no boyfriend, no colleagues (they are all gone for holidays), no friend to see, it’s really the loneliest Christmas I ever had.  I feel like I need to watch like 10 Christmas movies straight.  Plus some Christmas episodes of my favorite TV series perhaps.

It feels, never in the recent history that we all need a warm Christmas wishes, good Christmas movie, some carols, maybe a Christmas miracle or two, more than this winter.  Everyone is horrified of what’s going to happen, and even when we try to smile, the smile is not completely free of somberness.  We desire peace.

Then, come to think of it, we have probably been very fortunate for the past several dozen years.  Perhaps this is how people used to feel every winter, when there were fear of war and famine creeping up on every corner.  This is probably why we have Christmas every year, sing carols, and holds the eternal longings for a warm fireplace surrounded with family.  And those churches, stained glasses, paintings, and statues that now fill the museums for paid visits.  All for wishing peaceful future, especially in the coming new years.  Some needlework and tapestries to take ones mind away from troubles lie ahead.

We are probably not that fortunate this winter, but I wish you all very warm and peaceful holidays.

I will cuddle up with my knitting and a cup of hot chocolate, and watch “What a wonderful life.”